Crumblejon

“	This wouldn't have happened back in my youth... They wouldn't have landed a single hit on me. Ah, to be back in my prime again...	”
–Crumblejon reminiscing on his days as a Samurai.

Crumblejon is a Unique Recruit found in Mongrel. His dialogue consists mostly of you pestering him, with him getting annoyed and refusing to join your squad (unless you pester him enough in which case he will join out of frustration).

According to dialogue, especially between him and Luquin, Crumblejon was a former Samurai in the United Cities, famed as the "White Ripper" around the time when Luquin was first captured. He was heavily favoured by the nobles, who apparently found him "exotic".

Unfortunately, time has not been kind to the once-feared Samurai. After his master died, he was left as an old Ronin, drifting the lands unwanted and cannot sustain his conjugal duties as in his prime, he decided to retire in Mongrel. He is now known as "Crumblejon" on account of his crumbling bones, and he has become unnaturally stooped and shrunken. However, a trip to the local Surgeon may remedy this...

It is possible to get him to accept your request at no cost. He will also attempt to convince female members of your squad to give him a massage.

Crumblejon will also reveal that he has a wife, although they have been estranged for a substantial period of time.

Crumblejon's exact age is unknown, but he claims to be at least 45 years old. He also boasts that he had been killing Ninjas while most characters were in their mothers' wombs.

If he dies or is already recruited a generic sword for hire will spawn.

Statistics

• Greenlander

Statistics

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Attributes		Level
	Strength	24
	Toughness	10
	Dexterity	10
	Perception	1

Weapon Skills		Level
	Katanas	10
	Sabres	10
	Hackers	10
	Heavy Weapons	10
	Blunt	10
	Polearms	10

Combat Skills		Level
	Melee Attack	10
	Melee Defence	10
	Dodge	1
	Martial Arts	1

Ranged Skills		Level
	Turrets	10
	Crossbows	1
	Precision Shooting	10

Thievery Skills		Level
	Stealth	1
	Lockpicking	1
	Thievery	1
	Assassination	5

Athletic Skills		Level
	Athletics	10
	Swimming	10

Science Skills		Level
	Field Medic	10
	Engineer	1
	Robotics	1
	Science	1.2

Trade Skills		Level
	Weapon Smith	1
	Armour Smith	1
	Crossbow Smith	1
	Labouring	1
	Farming	1.2
	Cooking	1.2

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The Statistics here are taken from FCS.
Skills will be multiplied by the racial multiplier. Players should also be aware that non-player characters also level up while fighting.

Equipment

Weapons

Manufacturer	Model	Chance
Ancient (Manufacturer)	[Mid-Grade Salvage]	33.33%
	[Old Refitted Blade]	33.33%
	[Refitted Blade]	33.33%

Back slot

Name		Chance
File:Fragment Axe.png	Fragment Axe	100%

Apparel

Every piece of clothing below offers no coverage and thus, armour grading is not applicable.

Shirt

Name		Chance
File:Martial Artist Bindings.png	Martial Artist Bindings	100%

Legwear

Name		Chance
File:Gi Pants.png	Gi Pants	100%

Footwear

Name		Chance
File:Wooden Sandals.png	Wooden Sandals	100%

Dialogue

Talk to

[A shrivelled, sinewy old man glares at you with one eye. He looks expectant in a weary sort of way, like he's already bored with you, but he's got to talk to you anyway.]

• Who are you?
  

"Crumblejon"

• Why do they call you "Crumblejon"?
  

"Because of my crumbling bones. That's enough questions now."

• Can you actually lift that weapon?
  

"No. Go away."

• That's a really long beard.
  

"It's the source of my power. Stop pestering me!"

• Why are you so old?
  

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

• Join my squad!
  

"FINE! I'LL JOIN YOUR STUPID SQUAD!"

• Yay!
  

• Nah, I changed my mind.
  

"FUCK YOU!"

• Join my squad!
  

"No."

Captured by Cannibals

Crumblejon: "Fuck."
Crumblejon: "I'm too old for this dog shit."

Crumblejon: "Fuck."
Crumblejon: "Really, I'm too old and sinewy. You don't want to eat me..."
Crumblejon: "You'll kill me, cook me up, take a bite and spit me right back out..."
Crumblejon: "... You can't even understand what I'm saying, can you?..."
Crumblejon: "FUCK."

Being Healed

Crumblejon: "That was a close one. My wife would be worried..."
Crumblejon: "Speaking of which... should probably go find her at some point really..."

• Interjector: "Wait, you've got a wife?!"
  

Crumblejon: "Of course. It's not a problem though, we have an open relationship, see..."
Crumblejon: "I'm sure she's found someone else to warm the bed in my absence..."

• Interjector: "... Too much information, old man. Too much information."
  

The Cruelty of Time

Crumblejon: "Hnnngh, my bones hurt..."
Crumblejon: "Reach fourty five and you feel pain you never would have thought even existed..."

• Interjector: "Wait... fourty five?! You look over a hundred!"
  

Crumblejon: "Guess that's what I get for not wearing my straw hat in the desert..."

Luquin Banter

Luquin: "Still can't get used to all this open space, you know..."
Luquin: "I remember you... The White Ripper."
Luquin: "Time hasn't been kind to you."

Crumblejon: "You either. You look like gutter shit."
Crumblejon: "I remember them parading you through the streets of Heng..."
Crumblejon: "You were just a boy. What was that... 10, 15 years ago?"

Luquin: "I was tortured and starved in prison for 15 years... It takes its toll..."
Luquin: "Ha. What's your excuse?"

Crumblejon: *sigh*

ru:Крошка Джон